


SSB: TAS episode 32: The Morgana Cafe

by Quartz2006



Series: Super Smash Bros: The Animated Series [32]
Category: Batman: The Animated Series, Persona 5, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Super Smash Brothers, Super Wings
Genre: Business, Café, Character Death, Coffee, Customers - Freeform, Employees, Food, Humor, M/M, Public Blow Jobs, Sex Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-02-01 04:49:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21384217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quartz2006/pseuds/Quartz2006
Summary: Morgana and the gang got kidnapped by Dr. Hugo Strange. The main reason is that Hugo decides to open a cafe. But... He doesn't know the first thing about coffee.Note: I don't own the characters, only the story
Relationships: Paul (Super Wings)/Jett (Super Wings)
Series: Super Smash Bros: The Animated Series [32]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1420129





	SSB: TAS episode 32: The Morgana Cafe

At 11:00 am, Hugo Strange took out scissors from out of his pocket and cut a red ribbon behind an old café which was abandoned for many years at the west side of Gotham City. He named it: Hugo Café. “Daaadddd!” whines his son. “Why did we have to open a café in the middle of nowhere?”

"Because!" Hugo said. "Batman destroyed my scientist career and in order to make money, I had to buy this old shit so we won't become homos on the streets!"

"Whatever…." Eli Strange whispered. "Old fuck!"

"Now! It is time to go inside and make some money!" Hugo opened the door and was shocked. His employees (which are robots) are all gone. "Elite! What the hell happened to my employees!?" He said in his son's face.

Eli snickered. "Dad. I was trying to tell you before you open this trash."

"Then explain! What. Happened. To. My. Robots!?" Hugo says in anger.

"ITS BATMAN AND HIS VILLAINS! THEY DESTROYED ALL YOUR ROBOTS BECAUSE THE MAYOR ASKED THEM TO AND NOW THEY ARE ALL IN THE GARBAGE DUMP!!!" Eli yells.

Hugo's jaw dropped to the ground as he remembered 'some' of Batman's villains. "Well shit. No employees. NO CAFÉ!" He complained as he started to bang himself on one of the tables that he bought for $6,000.

"Hey, dad! Remember I invented that teleporter 6 years ago!" Eli took it out of his pocket.

"Yeah. It's a failure just like your mother said to me when you were born." Hugo complained.

"But dad. This might save your café!" Eli says. He turns it on as he disappeared.

"Yup. My wife was right…" Hugo said to himself as he again started to bang his head.

: : :

Behind a black and white door, there was a cat named Morgana. He was on his computer, watching gory videos on his computer, Razer Blade 15 Gaming Laptop. His eyes sparkle as women were crushed to death by boulders. He is watching this stuff because so he can learn new tricks to kill people. He actually likes to draw the gore saws. He takes out his super marker collection and started to colour a drawing of a man being raped to death by a giant. But then, Eli appeared in the room as Morgana says, "Good day sir! What can I help ya!" He shakes Eli's hand in happiness.

"Nah kitty! Your working with my dad!" Eli held Morgana with his hand as he teleported back to the abandoned café. Morgana landed on The Penguin's hat as it was smashed into a pizza looking-kind. Penguin fixed it as Batman, Two-Face and The Joker were not happy to be here. "Daaadddd! Your new employees are here!" Eli called out.

"DAD?!!" Batman and Two-Face shouts out in shock.

Hugo opened the door as he was smiling. "What in gory hell is goin' on?" Morgana questioned.

"Goddamnit, Morgana!" The Penguin said in anger. "You recorded us killing those garbage robots, send it Facebook, and now we have to work with this disgusting gentleman you dumb shit cat hole!" He pointed his umbrella at Hugo.

"Work?" Paul said, "I already have a fantastic job and working at a café is shit! And it's illegal to kidnap people and teleported them to the west of Gotham!"

"Awww C'mon Jett and Paul! Be nice to the scientist! I mean…. Look at his sad eyes!" Historia says as she pointed to Hugo.

"Even though he looks like Quasimodo…" Ymir whispered to Historia's ear.

Hugo started at the two Super Wing with eyes that looks like he just killed someone with an axe. The two planes cringed as Jett whispered, "Even though just met this guy, he makes me very uncomfortable…"

"Ah! It's ok baby! I'll keep an eye on him." Paul says as he stared Strange with angry eyes.

"Oh fuck this shit!" The Joker called out. "We aren't working for Hugo anymore!"

"He took all our money!" Two-Face called out.

"C'mon guys. Let's get the fuck out of here." Batman said as he started to walk away with Penguin, Two-Face, and The Joker. But just as Batman was about to take out his grappling hook. Eli quickly put on a device on their necks. "What the hell is this Hugo!" Batman said as he turned his head.

"Ah! This is a device where you'll be shocked whenever you are bad!" Hugo said as he smirked.

"Son of a bitch!" Two-Face muttered in anger. "Fine. We'll work for you ONE last time!"

Hugo smiled as he pushed all his 'new' employees into the café. "Oh boy oh boy! I'm glad you could all make it today!" He looks at his son. "Thanks." Eli nodded as the rest were waiting for instructions. "Anyways! We're gonna have so much fun!!" He clapped his hands as Kirby and Meta Knight coughed and sneezed. "I got each and one of your roles! Some of you are going to be in partners…. So my son will explain!"

"Alright faggots!" Eli announced. "Kirby and Meta Knight are going to be the Coffee Baristas! Batman, Two-Face, Penguin, and The Joker are going to be the Cashiers! Historia, Ymir? Jett and Paul are the waiters! Hugo and I are head chefs and Morgana is our assistant chef!"

All of the groan as Morgana cheered.

"Meta Knight? What is a Coffee Barista?" Kirby questioned.

"Well, it's basically when people sell coffee. Like, for example, McDonald's and Starbucks." Meta Knight said.

"Ah-ha!" Two-Face saw the cash register and opened it to reveal nothing in it. "Fucking bullshit!" He said in anger.

"Don't worry guys. Look down at my hands." Batman said as they all looked down and we're shocked. Batman is holding money. "Take it but don't tell Strange." Batman smiled.

They smirked as he took it all one by one. "Thanks, old pal," Harvey says with a smile.

"Ya know Jett," Paul said. "I'm glad Hugo didn't give you a maids dress."

"Why?" Jett questions.

"Because…. Let's just say I get horny when you wear a maids dress." Paul spoke quietly as he slowly started to erect but Jett calms him down by rubbing his cheek. "Thanks, Jett."

Ymir was disturbed by what she just heard. "You heard that Historia?" Ymir whispered. "That police plane says he gets horny when that red plane and put on a maids dress."

"Well. It's airplanes, Ymir. Anything can be weird. Like yesterday, Petra was in a fight with a fat guy named Rupert Throne because she stole one of his milk." Historia whispered back.

"What the fuck?" Ymir whispered back in shock.

But then, Hugo called out, "Who ready to cook?!" He opens his eyes as he saw everyone is mad at him (except Morgana). Meta Knight is the angriest because of his eyes as they turn blood red. Kirby calms him down by rubbing his head with his own. "Eh. Not a bad reaction really." But then he heard the doorbell ring. "And here comes our first customer!"

The customer was a fat boy who is 14 years old. "Holy moly! A new café This place sure looks nice!" He looks at the employees as they look still mad. "What a loving-looking place!" He started to walk to the cash register as Hugo watched him in a creepy way. He stopped as he was greeted with an angry Two-Face. "Hey there man. Can I have a ..." He trailed off before yelling, "VENTI ICED SKINNY DECAF HAZELNUT MACCHIATO NO WHIP ULTIMATE GRAND SUPER CRAFT PARTY COFFEE DELUXE PLEASE! Oh, and an Eggs Benedict on the side. Thank you." He smiled.

"Okay. One pile of shit coming right up!" Two-Face said in anger as he crossed his arms and looked at Hugo. "Go take a seat before I slit your throat…."

"Thank you!" The kid said before walking away to find a table.

Two-Face and Batman looked at each other before bang their heads together in anger. Penguin typed out what coffee the kid wanted as The Dark Knight and Two-Face bang even harder. The total was $107.63.

When the Penguin was done, Historia came over and took the reset list and gave it to Hugo. Hugo was so happy, he pushed Historia away. "OH BOY! YOUR FIRST ORDER!!!" He cheered. He went to the fridge to get eggs, but there is one problem, there are no more eggs in the fridge. "Empty? ALL EMPTY!!??" He shouts out as he throws things out of the fridge. "Crap! Kitty cat! Can you get more eggs from outside! There should have been a delivery!" Hugo called out to Morgana who was cleaning himself.

"Okey Dokey!" Morgana said in happy as he walked out of the café. He opened the door to outside as he looks for the delivery. He saw a guy who was walking out of the bathroom dressed up like an egg. Morgana looked straight as he saw a whole truckload of eggs. He turns to his right as he saw a chicken named Foghorn Leghorn who was on his phone, not looking while rocking a stroller with an egg inside. Morgana got an idea. He sneakily walked up to the stroller and carefully take out the egg and ran off with it.

Foghorn Leghorn put his phone back as he was shocked to see that the egg is gone. "Where's that egg? Oh, feathers! How am I gonna explain to the mother?" He questions himself before seeing the truck. He got an idea. He took one of the eggs and put it in the stroller. A similar size of the egg he once had. "There, the mother wouldn't notice anything is wrong." Foghorn Leghorn said as he took the stroller to a nearby park.

Meanwhile, Morgana cracked open the egg he stole and the egg fall into the frying pan and it was cooking. When he was done, he put it on a dish and it looks like a penis. "Jettie boi! Eggs Benedick coming up!" He throws the plate at Jett but it missed and Ymir caught it instead.

"Say what…?" Kirby questions.

"What the hell is this?" Meta Knight said as he read the reset.

"Ahem. Come on! Hurry up! I gotta fuc- I meant to give you more orders" Paul said as he looked mad.

The two puffballs looked at each other before they ran to the back of the building. They looked everywhere until they saw a Starbucks vending machine. Kirby took out his coin and put then into the machine. Then 56 cups of coffee popped out of the vending. Kirby gives it to Meta Knight for taste testing. Meta Knight lifts up his mask and drinks from the lid. He swallows it as he vomits because of the bitter taste. "Eh! Fuck it! This will do! Right?!" He said in a raspy voice.

"The heck is wrong with your voice," Kirby said as he sounds scared

"Oh, it happens when I drink bitter coffee. And that's why I like whip cream on it!" Meta Knight said. "Now let's go!"

The kid waited for his food to come. But he didn't expect it to come this quick. Ymir throws the Eggs Benedict on the table and Paul threw the coffee on the table as well.

The kid picked up a fork and started to chew on the Eggs Benedict, he swallows and took a sip of his coffee. “Hmmmmmmm?” hmmed the kid. The employees looked worried about what's his opinion. Two-Face and Batman stop banging the heads together as they looked at the kid. "Oh, golly gee! This food sure is good!" The kid said as he continued to eat.

Morgana cheers as Kirby and Meta Knight gave a high-five to each other. Jett and Paul sneakily went to the back of the building as Paul closed the door behind them with a smirk on his face.

But then the door suddenly opened and there was a whole lot of people saying 'food' and 'coffee'. This causes the employees to get very nervous. But Hugo didn't care. "YAY!! MORE CUSTOMERS!!!" He yelled. 

All the people ran inside the cafe as Historia holds a stop sign and says, “Ok guys, can we form a nice straight li-” she was cut off as she was trampled under by the running customers. “My intestines…” she said in pain.

Then a man in his 40s said in a raspy voice, “What’s up bitches! I’d like to order your finest hoes and alcohol please.” he said in a royal tone.

Ymir looked up at the guy in shock. “Are you in drugs!? This is a cafe! Not a strippers club they call it!”

“Come on! Chop-Chop! I'm a busy guy! Jeez, this serves sucks balls!” The man said before getting picked up by Ymir and throw him out of the window. “OW MY OVARIES!!” The guy yells in pain.

Ymir gritted her teeth together in anger. Historia lifted herself up the floor and said to Ymir, “Ymir! Don’t murder our customers, please! Remember, murder = bad.”

Ymir sighs, “Ugh… fine….” as she crossed her arms. Before they worked in the cafe, Historia was teaching Ymir to not murdered people. Back in their world, Ymir was very violent; even as a titan.

People in the line were waiting for their orders as the line was 7 ft long. A guy was checking the menu of what to eat. He looked at Batman as he slept on Two-Face; he was tired of taking orders for the customers so The Joker has to take over. “Whatta you want ass butt!?” The Joker said in a rude tone.

“I’d have a dick with cum on it!” The guy said as he smiles.

“Get out of here!” The Joker said as he pushed the guy into the trash. “Next!” he called out. Then a fat man walked up to The Joker as The Joker said, “Whatta you want?”

“Ahem.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll have a Pain doré à la crème pâtissière.”

“What?” The Joker asked in confusion. “Yeah I'm sorry, I don’t speak French.”

“I don't speak French clown, I just want my food. Chop-chop!” The man said in a royal tone.

The Joker gritted his teeth as he took out a gun and prepared to shoot the man. But Hugo saw this as he grabbed the gun out of The Joker’s hands. “No Joker! I don’t want you to murder my customers!”

“Fuck off Strange! I don’t even want to work for you!” The Joker said in anger as he took the gun out of Hugo’s hands as he shoots up in the air. 

The man was about to say when one of the customers shouts out, “HEY! YOUR HOLDING UP THE LINE! JESUS!” The man sighs as he walks out of the cafe in an angry mood. 

“Jackass.” The Joker whispered as he blows the smoke out of the gun. He throws the gun away as he went back to taking orders. Hugo left him alone as he went back to the kitchen with his son.

“GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!” Meta knight yells as he throws coffee as people’s faces in a fast way. “WHERE THE FUCK ARE JETT AND PAUL!? THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AND GIVING THE DAMN COFFEES TO THE MOTHERFUCKING CUSTOMERS!” He throws and throws more coffee at the customers. “KIRBY! GET MORE COFFEE! I'M RUNNING OUT OF DRINKS ALREADY!”

“Okie Dokie!” Kirby said in a happy tone as he ran to the back to get more coffee. But as he reached the back, he stopped and hid behind a nearby trash bin. He heard moaning, he took a peak and he gasped, Jett is sucking Paul's dick again. He slapped his forehead before getting pulled by a huge purple hand. "Meta Knight! What the fuck?!" Kirby whispered.

"What is taking you so long?" Meta Knight said in an angry tone. But then Kirby turns his head to see the planes. "Oh." Then he started to snickers. "Well then." He took off his mask as he tiptoed to the planes with a grin on his face. Kirby sighs as he heard the planes scream g in scaredness. They run back inside the café as Meta Knight laughed. "That'll teach those two to not have sex in the back. Now, let's get coffee!" Meta Knight went to the Starbucks vending machine as he pressed the button very fast like a gun. Some coffee hot Kirby whole others hit the wall. "Man. This job sure is easy as lemonade! All those shit bags customers are gonna be so pleased! Right, Kirby?" He turns his head to look at Kirby.

"Yup!" He said as he took some coffee and ran inside the building.

But as Meta Knight press the button, it explodes into pieces. His eyes turned into a light blue colour. "What?!" He said in shock as he pressed the button many times. "FFFUUUCCCKKK!!!" He yelled as Kirby ran back outside to see.

"What happened?!" Kirby let out.

"The machine ran out of coffee!" Meta Knight says as he held onto Kirby's head. "What are we going to do?!"

Kirby thought for a few seconds until he got an idea. "Meta Knight. I got an idea. Why not we put vodka in the coffee cups!"

"Kirby. Are you sure? People are gonna realize that it's vodka." Meta Knight said.

"We can put whipped cream on it!"

"Fine. But do you have a bottle of brown vodka?"

"Yup. I got it right here!" Kirby pulled out a whole bottle of brown vodka.

"Oh boy…" Meta Knight muttered as he and Kirby went inside the café and poured vodka and whipped cream into coffee cups. Kirby put up a price of $20.00. And plus one free coffee for $40.00 if you have a coupon.

Jett ran passed the puff all's as he yells, "FUCK! MORE ORDERS!" Then he trips on a plate.

"1 egg Benedict and bacon plate. 5 omelette with coconut milk. 1 hamburger large bacon with extra bacon 1 mushroom soup, 2 extra crispy deep-fried donuts…" Ymir said as she read all the orders.

Hugo and Eli were cooking fast while the kitchen is on fire. Hugo got a pan of eggs on his head: Eli was holding a pan of bacon and it was on fire, and Hugo was holding a cigarette in his mouth.

Eli looked at Morgana who was clean g himself again. "Uhhh…. Kitty cat. Some HELP would be nice.." Eli called out.

Morgana stopped clean g as he saw a sandwich and ate it all. "I am helping! Just making this Kitchen clean and comfortable!" He said as he started to clean himself once again.

Hugo gritted his teeth together very hard in anger. But then a customer called out, "UGH! This place sucks. I'm leaving!" This causes Hugo to gasps and looks at the customers.

"Where's my spaghetti! Where's my spaghetti!" A female said as she bangs on the table with her fist.

"I'M HUNGRY!!!" A male yells.

An elderly man ate the bean with cheese and whipped cream. "Yuck! It tastes like shit!" He said as he throws the plate as it hit Kirby on the head.

"Cmon! Let's get out of this shitty place!" A man said as he left the café. The customers started to run and scream as Historia was trampled again.

"NO!!! MY CUSTOMERS!!" Hugo yells in sh on as he passed out due to shocks.

The employees looked at Hugo as Ymir said, "Pir head chef passed out!"

Two-Face gasped. "Oh! That means it's home time!" He, The Joker, The Penguin and Batman took out their electric collars and proceed to leave the café.

Historia got up off of the floor and thought of a plan. "Guys!" She called out as all the employees looked at her. EMERGENCY STAFF MEETING!" She yells as she got everyone and closed the door to a meeting room.

"Well… my day is wasted because of being with you guys." Paul muttered in disappointment.

"Don't worry guys, we can do it! We're just missing one crucial thing…" Eli then took out a radio as he turns on some music. "Let me teach you guys a little thing called: Teamwork!" He said. But then suddenly, the room turned purple as huge purple hands emerged out of the floor as it grabbed Eli and crush him like paper to death, blood dripped down to the floor as the hand throw Eli out of the window.

The employees were shocked. Kirby turns his head to see Meta Knight, his hand was in the air as his eyes were a dark purple colour. The room went back to normal as Meta Knight said in anger, "What?! You guys want to listen to that!?"

Hugo awoke as he says, "That's it, guys! We just need to come up with a more team-based system!"

"TEAMWORK!?" Morgana shouts as he vomits on the floor.

"Cmon…. I have an idea! We'll use everyone's strength to our advantage!" Hugo said.

Most of the customers left the place. But then the door opens as the employees ran to their stages. Historia ran outside as she said, "Hey! Are you sure you want to go…?" She held up a sign that says: "All orders 1% off! Comes with free extra dip!"

The customers gasped as they ran inside. Meta Knight stretched out his knuckles. "Do you think you can handle stupid orders!" Batman said as he poured coffee (actually vodka).

"I've been fighting all my life and typing as well." Meta Knight said as he started to type fast like a bullet. He took the orders as Kirby, The Penguin, Batman, The Joker, and Two-Face were shocked.

"Ugh… whatever…. You guys aren't going to make us do anything." The Joked muttered in anger. He licked up a cup with coffee (vodka). "I don't get why people like this coffee crap." He drank the whole thing as his eyes lit up. "HOLY SHIT!" The Joker yells as he throws coffee at the customers.

"He shouldn't drink it," Kirby said.

"Why? It's coffee?" Harvey says.

"Actually it's not. It's brown vodka with whipped cream in it.' Kirby explained.

The Penguin, Batman, and Two-Face looked at each other in shock. " Ok…." The Penguin whispered.

"GOAL!!!" Morgana got out a golf stick as he hit the piece of steak. Hugo got out a flamethrower as he heats up all the things Morgana hits. The food landed on plates as Jett and Historia took them and put them onto tables. Ymir and Paul throw the customers onto the tables as some of them got brain damage.

Hugo smiled as he yells, "YES!!!!!" The customers started to eat the food as they give thumbs it. "We… WE DID IT!!!" Hugo shout out.

But then the cops showed up as they arrested Hugo and put him into the car. "Thank you for calling us about the murder Harvey." Jim Gordon says.

"Your welcome Jimbo!" Harvey said as he shakes Jim's hand. The police drive away as another car appeared and a man opened the door as Harvey greets him with a handshake. "Ah. Jacob Lobo! Good to see you!"

"Ya, you Harvey! Cool place!" Jacob said.

"Yup. And this is where you'll work!" Harvey says as Jacob walked around the place.

"Two-Face! What the hell was that?" Kirby said as he pulled Two-Face scarred hand. "Hugo went to prison and then a guy working here!"

"Oh. I called the police about Hugo's son's death and I called Jacob to be the CEO of the café." Harvey said.

"Oh. Well, this is our chance to get you off here!" Kirby said as he ran out of the café. Meta Knight followed as well the others. "Proshchay, kafe! (Goodbye café!)" Kirby said in Russian as he and the rest ran back home as the sunset.

"Say. I wonder where Eli's dead body is?" Morgana questioned.

"Who knows, like what Hugo said 'he's a failure' and he was not joking," Kirby said.

Eli's body was on the floor as rats and flies started to eat it as they took out flesh and body parts as the smell started to spread.

The end


End file.
